Who is Pip Rae Anyway?

Hey Hey, It’s Pip Rae.

Thanks for stopping by.

So whether you’re an old friend I haven’t seen for a while, a new friend doing their due diligence or a cyber stalker, yes! you know I know what you’re doing, you’re probably a curious googler.   So, I just want to say hi and share how I’ve spent the past 10 years reinventing myself:

 to find an identity without a badge,

≈ define my roles beyond parenting children and

≈ build a better, kinder, safer, happier, more positive, less stressed world to live in.

So what do I do? Generally I try to help people when they ask for it of course. 

My day job is as a writer, social justice journalist, podcaster and story teller and I’ve been doing it for just on 28 years.   Whether it’s True Crime or Memoir Stories, and I’ve even dabble in the Drama with a twist of fiction, every day I am  interviewing people about themselves to extract the interesting, unusual and unique traits and qualities that they can leverage to build their personal brands. I help them see what I and other see.

So, I also own a local podcast station and produce podcasts for others and myself, about the stuff that matters to people who want to know.


Over the last 4 years, I’ve seen the demand in helping victims of Family and Domestic Violence as well as misidentified offenders understand the systems and navigate the process of finding safety, protecting children and holding their partner or family member accountable for their behaviour, in and out of the courts.

I’ve been lucky enough to interview CEO’s and industry spokespeople in the DV space,  listened and heard numerous victim accounts, the version of perpetrators and the challenges counsellors face. They’ve all shared their frustrations and now, I’ve found a space where I can help people share their story safely and reduce the anxiety ridden task of going blindly into a system that can be brutal and disappointing.

So I decided to create a podcast from the interviews I’ve done that explain and explore the experiences and impact of Domestic and Family Violence on individuals, families, communities and the practical information to help others understand the system and navigate the process, as well as embrace the chaos with renewed optimism and coherence.

Many victims feel isolated, ashamed and alone – not knowing where to turn or how to move forward.

Many perpetrators feel shame, guilt, humiliation and embarrassment – and consequently face a process that will hold them accountable for their behaviour.

The debate as to whether Apprehended Violence Orders help, harm or hinder the intervention of intimate partner and family violence continues, and Australian families are in a crisis of still loving and protecting the perpetrator, whilst stopping the violence and abuse in their relationships.


In my role I sit between the Police and Lawyers, Counsellors and Social Workers, research and policy providing the information, education, experience and advisory needed to enable others to become empowered, so they can navigate the justice system and away from conflict.  In particular I support those in the unfair world of AVO’s.  Poorly investigated if at all, applications leave victims and perpetrators feeling vulnerable. 

The current approach to intervention seeks out the more aggressive and defines them as the perpetrator, and many are misidentified.  It forces the perpetrator to seek legal counsel and advice and the victims are left unrepresented.   The role of the police and the investigators are to remain impartial with a protectionist bias towards the victim.


What we do know about Domestic and Family Violence is that it doesn’t happen in a vacuum, there is a power imbalance caused by manipulative and controlling behaviours. There becomes a level of dependence and disrespect with each party playing one of three roles, Victim, Perpetrator and the Rescuer. It is co-created by those involved, a dynamic of fear and enabling.  We also know, understand and have empathy for the allowing or forgiveness of breaching personal boundaries in a relationship and help you to understand how that plays out in patterns of abusive behaviour.

Intimate and family relationships are reliant on three crucial elements. Respect, Trust and Honesty.   It’s a measurement only you can assess.

Within this scope I am able to guide men and women, who, by situation or circumstance are experiencing patterns of behaviour and emotional chaos, before or after being thrust into the system where they are left to navigate a process that is foreign, daunting and confusing. By listening to their stories, I identify the issues and concerns, isolate the incidents and distill the evidence.

We make holistic recommendations based on individual cases.

We help people prepare statement, letters, emails and responses.

We make referrals to the right people who have the right advice at the right time so they get the support and stay sane.

I’m often referred to provide insight into the investigation process and know how hard it is to walk into a police station to get the help you need at that particular time and the outcome you want.  We can give you that confidence just from one conversation.


So I’d love to tell you about UPSTREAM INVESTIGATIONS.  Private Investigators for Domestic and Family Violence.

A guided solution focused session to help you identify the issues and concerns, understand the process and navigate the system in hope of seeking the outcomes and justice you want.


Victims don’t necessarily want the relationship to end.  They want the behaviour to stop.

“This is a unique service for those who are curious about what they are feeling in their relationship. If you are googling to validate an experience of escalating conflict, find indicators of abusive behaviour and acts of violence within the home or family relationships as well as sexual assault it can be confronting about what to do or how to respond.   This includes everything from unwanted sex, S.H.I.T. (stalking, harassment, intimidation and threats), assaults, coercive control, fearful confrontations and a breakdown in communication ( also known as stonewalling, grey rock and silent treatment)”

So in a word I  ‘help’.  

As a Private Investigator for Domestic and Family Violence

I’m helping and supporting victims of sexual assault and domestic and family abuse to understand the system and navigate the process of justice.

Upstream Investigations goes beyond the facts to understand the root cause and capture the impact of Domestic and Family Abuse and Violence on you and your children so that you feel confident and prepared to respond to escalating conflict and escape the abuse.

Recognise the signs and signals.

Respond to the situation with safety.

Refer you to options and opportunities.

If you’ve got questions I’ve put the answers into a podcast, with interviews that explain the answers.

In this series I’ve interviewed victims and counsellor who shared their stories and frustrations.

Explain the limitations of Police and Laws and speak with lawyers and DV experts

who are trying to support victims and hold perpetrators accountable for abuse and violence.

Check out the All about Avos ONESHEET for all media enquiries.

We help the curious googler, who feels unheard and unsure who is looking to validate their experience and find the words to describe what’s happening in their home and relationships. Using a combination of  the Life Story Work and Time Line.

This is not a crisis service.



Toolkit5 Reasons to FIND YOUR IDENTITY